This summer I spent a lonely week with a terrible cold. I passed the time watching the first three seasons of Bewitched, the old sixties sitcom. I got through so many episodes because, as the show progressed, I felt like I was getting a different impression of Samantha Stevens than I had ever before (since watching Nick at Night as a kid, that is).

I think we now have something to learn from Samantha and her struggle with the instantaneous rewards of her magic. As a witch, Samantha has the ability to conjure up whatever she would like, anytime, anywhere. Her magic makes life fun and easy, and who would give it up? Many critiques of the show lament that in a burgeoning feminist era Samantha is forced by her husband to give up her magic, and thus her independence, to be the picture perfect suburban housewife. This point fails to give Samantha agency over her promise to stop using magic for everyday things.

As I lay on my couch sick as ever, home alone, wishing I hadn’t made so many dishes fixing myself chicken soup from scratch, I saw that Samantha (magically immune to mortal sickness) wanted to work, she wanted to do things by hand with her own skill and body. By (trying to) give up her magic she was claiming her independence from her mother, her upbringing, and- importantly, from the instant, no effort life that sixties consumer culture was selling to women.

There is an interesting mess of consequences that came from the post-war production of consumer goods and technology and the intense marketing of these products to women. This marketing, combined with women being interested in, and allowed to, or obligated to work outside the home, successfully undermined the skill of the domestic realm while also allowing women to expand outside of it (the home that is). It is relevant to us now because most of us are living without necessary skills to live a life that is not dependent on consumerism. We have to buy things from other people, usually large companies to cover our most basic needs.

Knowing the role of marketing, pushing tv dinners and touting new gadgets, in the Bewitched era I think it is commendable for Samantha Stevens to pursue a more hand-made life. Granted, at those time she back-slides and does up a whole clean house, new dress, and elegant dinner in one nose twitch, the audience was more entertained and probably reassured knowing that, while maybe eating their tv dinners, even the best wives wouldn’t do all the work if they didn’t really have to.

Is Samantha Stevens a good example of how we should live today, no. But I think she is an unexpected reminder how liberating and often positive it can be when we don’t always take the easy way in life, especially when it comes to our kitchen and our food. We are happier people when we put time, effort, and skill into basic tasks and the fact that we do very little of that puts us in an interesting mess indeed, and the history of all that is something I plan to explore/discuss further (sneak preview…new book called the Radical Homemaker, learn more here).

                          

The tiny kitchen was all over the NY Times this week from the debut of a cute video bit (that I bet will become a regular thing) to the discussion of great cooks having modest work spaces from Mark Bittman, and for some reason the Well blog also brought it up (I assume because cooking at home is generally better for you and pointing out how if Mark Bittman can manage in a cramped space, the perceived inadequacy of your kitchen is one less excuse).

As I said in a comment on the Well blog I think small works best when you have a few things that are quality and get the job done. Bittman’s tag line is that you only need a “A stove, a sink, a refrigerator, some pots and pans, a knife and some serving spoons,”… “All else is optional.” Another commenter made that point that if you can crummy tools it makes cooking really hard, and I have to agree. A cramped space with bad tools makes cooking a chore. But a little attention to detail, anything you can do to improve the space and any investment made on a knife sharpener, a heavy pot or two makes the restraint of space hardly noticeable.

Here are the three things I like best about my tiny kitchen:

Even though it has to be cleaned often (and of course there is no dishwasher) it cleans up fast

The efficiency of having everything within arms reach (or arm, plus step stool in my case) can’t be beat

The less space you have the more money you save on gadgets you don’t need because there is literally no room (You can see in the bit about the new Tiny Kitchen videos that she has not used this advantage as her kitchen has spread out to make her living room look like a diner and she has a mess a gadgets that seem to be pushing their IKEA storage solutions to the max )

The last is a blessing and a curse depending: For the most part i like to cook on my own, just do the whole thing start to finish, just to do it my way. And there can’t be too many cooks in the kitchen, when there is literally only room for one. When I need help though, space seems to open up (maybe because I allow it to?)

I am happy to see the tiny kitchen get some good attention because I think it does well to represent a renewed appreciation for simplicity at a time when we all need to scale back. You simply don’t need a lot to live well and the more people that realize that and live it out in the way they eat, shop, and make their homes the better off we all will be.

                          

The trick now is to know what that money is for. Obviously for “living expenses”. But my cost of living has always just expanded to fit my income.

Once I got to a place where we might not make rent, it became very clear that previously we hadn’t been just covering the basics. We were spending money because we could and then starting again at the same place each month.

Making enough seems to create a mindset of extra money. We feel that in order to maintain a level of normalcy that money should be spent.

The other state of mind that created these habits is the intention/plan that we will someday make more. This is dangerous. These habits just get worse.

Being in a tighter situation it finally occurred to me in a real way, instead of a general philosophical way that I need to re-define my basic expenses. Otherwise, why do I work? Where am I going? It’s one thing to work part time and try to make ends meet and really just be plain poor. And another to make good money and never feel like I have any, and work all the time.

For a while I have tried to keep in mind the concept of satisfaction through rejecting a desire rather than fulfilling it. I promise it’s not so puritanical, and only applies to material goods/desires. The trick for me is applying this to more and more things that seem reasonable given my new income.

GetRichSlowly has a nice discussion on this. The overall issue is “lifestyle inflation” and the real heart of it, is being satisfied with what you have.

I will say that many of the discussions on cutting costs start at a higher level of consumerism that most of us are at. We wouldn’t have bought a new car or any car at all, we can’t really afford brand new things anyway. We already feel like we’ve pared down our consumption relatively far, so how much further could we go? But then we’re still in the place of just working through all our time and spending all our money, so something must change.

This idea of satisfaction really should go hand in hand with understanding our purpose for work. And our enjoyment of work. If we are working too hard, doesn’t it seem good to get to a different level of satisfaction or basic living and then work less…and maybe be happier?

Here’s an interesting source of inspiration for getting creative with our idea of work.

In thinking about purpose, I am working at this full time job to:

• support our little household while one is in school.
• get out of old habits, pay for old mistakes, and build the savings.

I will commit to:

• Redefining our baseline and our priorities of money. The more I spend now, the more I have to work later.
• not indefinitely putting off working less and living that good simple life.

GetRichSlowly has really been a great resource for me in this. From the discussions on budgeting I found this program, Pear Budgeting. I like it for the endless capacity for custom categories and because it makes you enter your receipts. This is going to be the hardest part, because why would you spend your time with this…but how else will you really know where the money goes? And is does all the math etc. Just going through the first step of entering in guesstimates of expenses and seeing how it all adds up was a good start.

A lot of this is common sense passed on through adages over the years, now with some experience and real pressure it’s all sinking in.